Our Life

music to my ears...

2012-02-14T10:47:00.000-08:00

i love the noise these two little lovelies bring to our home :)

apparently he's been taking notes...he's never been put in time out before, but one day he put himself there when we told him to put down the remote! this was a recreation b/c we thought it was so funny ;)

Ella's First Date!!!

2012-02-12T10:37:00.000-08:00

When we found out we were having a little girl, Mike immediately began to dream of that special daddy daughter relationship. When we first found out we were pregnant, Mike immediately said he wanted a baby girl. Mike was meant to love a little girl...obviously :) What these two have is rare and so special. For Valentines Day, he took her on her first date. All I have to say is her future husband has to be one heck of a man for this loved little lady to even consider dating him...all because she has such a special daddy that has taught her how to be loved.

She was greeted at the door with a red rose (her demand)...

For her date, she requested: spaghetti, ice cream, a movie, a red rose, a dance, curly pigtails and to be picked up in the truck :) Daddy made ALL of this happen of course! We tried on dresses the night before. She twirled in each of them and picked the one that twirled the biggest :)

She skipped so happily all the way to the truck :)

She told Daddy that this was such a fancy date...

Mike loves dating Ella to show her how she should be treated by a true gentleman and to give her a strong sense of love, admiration, and security in the lovely little lady she is. I can't wait until Luca is old enough to take me out!!!

Lately

2012-02-05T05:55:00.000-08:00

I have been a horrible picture taker lately which makes this blog kind of boring, but seriously I've been SO tired lately! I've just been walking through my days and taking care of business while trying to keep my eyelids open! I think it's just the business of late and the post holiday rest and catch up that never happened. So we have spent our weekends hanging with friends, squeezing in a date here and there and hibernating for the remainder of winter to get ready for Spring!

I go back to the doctor next week for what will hopefully be either my last check up or next to last check up to be "cleared" of all post molar pregnancy issues. Pray all goes well!

Could they be any sweeter? I love how much they love each other. I hope they always do!

Mike and I got a fun LATE night away thanks to Amy and Hersson who basically spent the night at our house to let us stay and party the night away! The wedding was so much fun and absolutely beautiful. Congratuations Mr. and Mrs. Kling!

Tonight we are starting the week off right at a Super Bowl Party!

all things lovely

2012-01-27T09:49:00.000-08:00

can i get an amen?

tiny dancer...

love this dog...

love these babies...

love him...

have a great weekend!

a little of this and that

2012-01-15T06:49:00.000-08:00

Lot's of exciting things have been happening here at the Reading house! I can't wait to report on those things later--but mama is sickly today so I'm just gonna lay here on this couch and blog about these two little lovelies...

this little dude has been on a trial base gluten and casein free diet to see if/how it helps his alopecia. Gluten includes everything that contains wheat and most things that contain preservatives...so like-everything. And casein is in dairy-which is like everything else he has left to eat :) but we have gotten the hang of it and it actually is helping. We are going to give it a few more months to see exactly how much it will help, but we have hair growth! I also want to see what is actually the diet and/or if it is a part of the regrowth pattern, which is why we will give it more time.

we let him break his diet every now and then. the first time we gave him real food about a month after we started this was in december. we ordered this boy a quarter pounder and he ate every last bite!!! he's never even eaten more than half of a regular happy meal-but he seized his opportunity for sure. and he was happy :)

this is what most of our days have looked like lately! we are enjoying a super relaxed post holiday schedule :)

Also, I'm behind on Luca's well check stats. I was late taking him in for his 15 month well check. Like 2 months late...oops! Anyway, he checked out "perfect"! However he is slowing down on the growth charts these days. Never did I ever think my nearly 9 1/2 pounder (a week early at birth) would have ever been called "petite", but he's slowed down a lot ranking at a whopping 31st percentile in height and weight :) He's very muscular and still has his big bowed chest--he just doesn't have any baby fat and he's not super tall!

and these are just because he's so darn cute :)

And have I mentioned that this little guy is into EVERYTHING?!?! I walked away last Sunday morning to grab my jacket before church and in the 2 seconds I took my eye off of him-he broke the dog bowl, tried to chew on the broken piece and cut his lip AND crawled up on the kitchen table to get my coffee mug that I strategically placed in the center so he couldn't reach it and he poured it down the hallway. We've started putting the remotes out of reach because he's obsessed with them and he hides them like a dog hides a bone! He hid our remote in the Christmas tree and it took us a month to discover it. The crafty little dude got the laundry hamper, carried it into the living room, turned it upside down and crawled up to reach the remotes. We can't outsmart him!
BUSTED :)

Ella and Luca got superhero capes for Christmas this year :) They love flighting around the house in them. Ella's favorite thing to do is throw Pippa behind the couch so she can rescue her-over and over again. Poor Pippa! But Ella sure does have a blast. I love her big "imagillation" ;)

And here is the little lady :) She is such a doll...

This is Ella with her American Girl doll and their matching Christmas dresses :) I forgot the doll at Christmas (along with everything else including my mind) so we had to wait for our picture.

so cute together ;)

And then there's the newest addition to our family! She has just fit right in! We have learned a lot about Pippa. She loves to play with jingle bells. Her favorite treats are not beef chews, they are mini marshmallows. She likes to play with balls that she can bounce and tackle--like a cat. so we have been visiting the cat section to find her a few toys she'll actually play with. She enjoys perching on the back of the couch and playing under the bed-like a cat. She like's to prey and pounce-like a cat. Even though she has some kitty like tendencies--she's so cute and the PERFECT dog for us :)

Never a Dull Moment With the Readings

2012-01-06T14:59:00.000-08:00

HELLOOOOOO 2012. I welcome you with arms wide open and a big smile on my face! To say 2011 was difficult would be an understatement of the century. I’m not going to say much more about it because it was soooo last year. All I’m going to say is that even in the darkness…the deep, scary, oppressing darkness of the year that was 2011, God was there. There was absolutely nothing different about the track of our lives from December 31, 2011 to January 1, 2012. We did not wake up into a new life. However, God definitely put an emphasis on the timing. In the weeks before, the darkness was closing in and we could almost see light. In the week after the new year the dawn is rapidly appearing. It’s not a do over, it’s just a progression and a very clear message from God-you made it and now you can see my purpose.

Each thing we’ve endured has had purpose and boy are we better for it in all the right ways-but I would gladly be the lesser person and give it all back. HA! It didn’t break us down and it certainly did not strain our marriage. We somehow managed to rise above it. With God's grace of course. Now it’s time to rebuild, restore and heal. We have received so many blessings in just one week. It is so great to see God moving. It is a reminder that He was there, He is here, and He will always be. I believe there are certain emotions only a mother can feel--just like I believe people who have been given tough times are blessed with a greater capacity to live life, love, have joy and peace if they abide in Christ.
There will definitely be hard times ahead. I can already name a few! But it’s always the darkest before the dawn, and we have arrived. There is a season for everything I guess. So let me catch you up to date on some things!

Pippa: God-or Santa, not sure which one yet- dropped the perfect little puppy in country. I must have been a VERY good girl this year because she’s a little doll and so healing for my heart! My due date is coming up soon and I reaaallllly need something warm and cuddly to lay in my lap. She just happened to find my father-in-law out in the big wide world. I could make a joke right about him but I won’t ;) and I knew before I met her (or asked my husband) that she was mine so they saved her for me. We met her at Christmas and she met all of my requirements: free, cute, potty trained, plays gently, tolerates a ornery little boy and his big squeezy bear hugs, sleeps a lot, smart, doesn’t chew ANYTHING, not aggressive, and no barking-only a whisper bark when she thinks the boogie man is walking up to my house. Now where do you find a dog like that? That’s not really even a dog. She is all these things and was sent just at the right time. When I ~~asked~~ told Mike, he already knew she the one and was coming home anyway. Oh, and he actually likes her too!

Molar Pregnancy- March will be the month I will be in the clear of all the molar pregnancy shenanigans and I can move on with my life. This part has been a nightmare! There’s been just a couple bumps and bruises along the way, and it could have been worse. But still a nightmare none the less. Lord have mercy if I have to have one more round of blood work, scan, x-ray, sonogram, shot, biopsy, procedure, or test of sorts I’m gonna cry about it-like a toddler tantrum kicking and screaming fit of my sweet Ella Bella’s caliber! (kinda joking but not really) OR if I have to sit in the waiting room one more time with the same girl and her inappropriate jokes who was pregnant right along side of me and has yet to realized that my bump has yet to catch up with hers the past 8 months Ima gonna slap her in the face. And that I’m not joking about. Somehow I manage to get the same day and time of appointment as her. The first 3 months I was pregnant so it was just weird. The last 6 months-pure torture. I have 1 or 2 more visits and it should only be blood work if all goes well. I think I can handle that.

Baby #3- I have found peace and healing with our loss. I still have days when I think about him and just want it to be different. But it’s not. I think about what I “should” be doing/planning for or how big my belly should be. But most of all I just really want to know him. I wonder what he would look like with his brother and sister. But then I remember we will someday! I used to feel like we all were cheated, including him. But Mike and I talk openly about him a lot and one day, it occurred to us that even though it sucks for us, what a blessing that heaven is all he’ll ever know! This is how we came up with a name for him. We named him Asher because it means “life in abundance” and that is all he’ll ever know. We don’t go around calling him by name. It’s just a name for us to use when we talk about him that is more personal with meaning because is our child. Psalms 84:10 says “better is one day in your courts than thousands elsewhere.” It randomly popped in my head one day after my D&C and I knew it was for me. I’ve said this verse to myself probably every day and while I haven’t heard that song in years, I now hear it all the time. Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad Ella and Luca are here with me! Right where they should be. But God had a different plan for Asher and it brings me joy in a very weird way. I have a little more treasure in heaven waiting for me someday.

Luca: Alopecia is really not that big of a deal for us. If you really want to know how I feel about it, you can read my blog post here if you haven't already. I had a hard time for a while worrying about him as a child. But now I know for sure-he.will.be.fine. Not to mention, his head is perfectly round and by summer will be tan and it’s pretty darn cute! God made him for this so I rest my case. It was just one more thing at the time and I was worried for him. Everyone has something to go through or deal with at some point and I would choose this over many many many things. I had a 2 month period of time looming over my head as we had to run a gammet of tests on him. Since he’s so young, there were some other things that they had to check into. And guess what? It was all NORMAL!!! Of course it wasn’t until after the New Year that we got that news which was one more blessing to count!

Family: I-love-my-family. LOVE them! I feel as though our families have been under attack too this past year. Both sides of our family have had a lot of CRAP to deal with. The CRAP doesn’t even include my grandmother’s cancer-which the word crap doesn’t do justice to. What a nasty disease! I was so blessed this Christmas to get to see her 3 days in a row and got some one on one time. And she looked wonderful. Of course she shook the pneumonia in November because that’s just what she does. She fights back! She was feeling good and was able to join us for Christmas. It was so nice to have her around for the close of this season.

And then there is job—January of 2012 marks new and scary adventures for the Reading family as we listen, learn, and obey God’s calling on our life. No matter what happens, it will be fun and we have our friends and family. Mike and I have noticed many “seasons” of our marriage. There was Porter Place townhome season in Arkansas as newlyweds, the Plano Apartment season, the Coppell season comes in two parts: before and after Luca’s birth. One thing they all had in common in spite of the ups and downs-FUN AND ADVENTURE! We aren’t sure what is coming up in a new season before we set out for New York. I guess we shall see! I’m excited about some prospects and humbled by God’s love and provision in the mean time. I’ll attach our prayer letter in a future post to read--that is if you’re not blind from reading this long novel of a post. Like I said, there is never a dull moment with the Readings!

Our Holly Jolly Christmas

2011-12-31T09:12:00.000-08:00

It was such a wonderful Christmas this year. It's been a tough year for a lot of us, but in this, we found so much joy and thankfulness to be together.

We started at Mimi and Pop's house. This is the little tree that the kids get to decorate every year on Christmas Eve.

And this year was Ella's turn to put the star on the top!

And of course Betsy and Ballard had to get back to the North Pole to help Santa, but they left very nice letters to the kids :)

Loved Ella's expression when she realized the big one was hers!

and this guy thought he was soooo cool on his truck. and he was of course!

Luca and Uncle David!

celebrating advent together.

Watching a Christmas movie on Christmas Eve night. cozy :)

Then we drove to Nana B and Papa Bo's. Setting out the goodies for Santa! We thought we'd switch it up this year and give him donuts.

Twas the night before Christmas...

Santa was here!

Ella woke up and saw glitter in his cup and on his plate. Some of his magic was left behind!

He must have been running late because he left his foot prints left his magical snow behind!

playing a snowman game

Christmas Sunday

Beautiful babies!

Then we had our family Christmas.

3 generations! The 4th was running wild somewhere :) I was SO happy that Granny was able to join us!

After the games were played, the dinner was eaten and the gifts were unwrapped, we had to work it off with a little wii dance and Michael Jackson The Experience wii dance. There was a lot of hip swinging, hee and hawing, and maybe a couple dance offs :)

Christmas Fun

2011-12-19T19:06:00.000-08:00

This post will be a little random! It's just what we (Mike, Luca, Ella, Betsy, Ballard and myself) have been up to lately...

tinseling the tree (this drove ella crazy b/c they messed our tree up)

going to see santa--first year she didn't have a cow except for when she was a tiny babe! last year we got her up there and she smiled, but she was hyperventilating the whole time.

Luca, however, has developed a strong sense of stranger danger :)

I told Santa what she wanted because "she felt too shy". Then he told her what a good girl she had been and that she's a great helper. Then she said, "Merry Criscris Santa". Melted my heart!

I thought this was clever. Ella walked in, said "that's not even funny" and rolled her eyes and went back to bed. The girl has got some major attitude--just the right amount to get her through :)

christmas cookies!

Betsy made a puzzle of herself!

and this one is just because he's so darn cute.

and a little mischievous...into EVERYTHING!

fishing in the potty with a candy cane...

and reading a christmas book in the baby bed under the tree.

I only have one picture, but we have also been celebrating advent with Ella every Sunday. We have a special advent candle and she really has learned so much about the true meaning of Christmas. We have had so much fun this year celebrating and having fun with our little lovelies. We are ready to go home to our family. Oh there's no place like home for the holidays!!!

alopecia 101

2011-12-11T19:07:00.000-08:00

I've kissed this little boys' head so many times the past 3 days that anytime I make kissy noises at him, he shoves his head in my face...not his lips. Love.

First I want to start by saying I have the most wonderful friends and family in the world! Everyone has been so encouraging and I can tell they truly embrace my beautiful little bald baby boy and see his beauty-even though he has a new doo :) Not everyone knows about alopecia. I didn't...so I want to explain. Most importantly, I want you to know our perspective and approach we plan to take as his parents. We know that this can and will be his greatest asset with our guidance--and yours too if you are a part of his life. It takes a village, right?

I've known he's had alopecia since August. I really have been fine with it all along. The only thing that has been hard for me is the initial shave because although he's so stinkin adorable, I fear the outside world and now it is time for me to start thinking and planning for my parenting approach. People can be so skidish about anything different from normal. Who wants to be normal anyway? Thankfully he's a boy so as of high school, he'll look like half of the boys anyway and won't have to deal with the shaving! I've just gotta get him through the primary school years.

So first of all--I want people to know what it is so they can tell their kids about it--especially if they are friends with Luca. Kids are very formative and accepting of anything they understand and are not fearful of. So even though it's obvious, tell them that Luca doesn't have any hair! God made him perfectly-he just doesn't have hair! Plain and simple. I can't protect him from everything, but I dread the day he hears someone say, "why doesn't that kid have hair"as though it's not a good thing.

So here is the diddy...There are 3 stages of aplopecia. Areota, Totalis, and Universalis. So far it appears that he only has the areota which is the least extensive version of the DISORDER. It's not a disease. No one can catch it. He's not sick. He is not in harms way. It's simply an auto immune kink and his immune system overreacts to hair follicles. That's all.

This is the most important thing I want everyone to know---our perspective and approach. We invite you to take it as well if you are a part of Luca's life!

1) Luca is marked by God to be noticeable and memorable. He is special. God made no mistake when he made Luca that's for dang sure! He can do something amazing. He will be amazing because he will take pride in who he is as a person and in his character and find that most important. This is a lesson most kids learn a little later. He will make friends that love HIM. What a blessing.

2) We will pray with him and give THANKS to God for that smooth and oh so kissable bald head. We will pray that because he doesn't blend into the crowd, that he will use that to do great things. These are the things we will pray in front of him. I am so so so thankful that he is healthy, I get to keep him, I am not in fear of losing him, he's not sick, he has no need for medicine, no treatments. He is PERFECT! Never have I ever been so thankful for healthy children in my life.

3) In private, I will pray for him to have hair, or a season with hair. As a parent, you never want to see your child ever have to face anything...especially anything that may bring adversity. Even if it could make them an even better person. I know those times will be ahead for both of my kids. It's unrealistic to expect that they will never have to deal with anything or face anything. I'm the mom that gets on to other kids at the playground if they cut in front of my kid in the line to get on the slide. But still, I will pray against anything that may bring them adversity until the day I die. I will pray that he owns whatever he's got at the time. I will pray for a strong confident character that doesn't really give a flip. I will pray that he is caring/sensitive and not wussy/sensitive. I want him to have thick skin. I want him to have GRACE for others that may try to tear him down. I want him to have a ridiculously mature understanding of the things that matter in life. I will pray all of these things in private.

4) I never want to make him feel that he is not whole without hair. Not gonna lie...I'd rather him be a little vain :) He's a good looking little boy and some day he'll be a good looking big boy with or without hair. Go with it and be proud! Work it! That's all I gotta say :)

5) While he is a baby, we will explore different treatment options and diets that may help him. If they work, great. We will keep at it. If they don't-that's fine too! When he comes to the age to realize he's going to doctors, we will stop. I never want to give him the impression that there is something about him that needs to be different or ''fixed". If he's older and asks about treatments or wigs, I'll do anything (ok most things) for him. But I will not take him to specialist after specialist like he's sick or something is wrong. I truly believe that this is how it would seem to a child. And quite honestly, there aren't any proven treatments to the disorder. There's not a lot of research because it's purely cosmetic so I guess there's no sense of urgency.

I am thankful it's not my daughter. Could you imagine? I am thankful that his onset was early. He will never have to give up his hair. Treatment is more effective in patients with early onset. Out of all of the personal stories I've read, women have a harder time. Men that had it later in life have problems with image and acceptance. Men and children who have always had it are in a much better place. They've had friends and have grown up to marry and have families of their own. They faced snide comments from random bullies at school, but unfortunately that happens to everyone. I'm so so so thankful for this mother I have been introduced to. Her son has universal alopecia (no hair on body at all). She has provided me a lot of wisdom and insight. She is a few years ahead of me in all of this and gives me such great perspective, advice and encouragement. Her son is beautiful and happy.

For those of you who are a part of our lives, we just ask that you rejoice in the specialness of our baby boy. Rub his head. Kiss his head. Don't feel sorry for him. This boy is blessed. The only "rules" are what to talk/pray about in front of him. Please know this is not an effort to shelter him, but to raise him to own the right message about how amazing his is.

tis the season

2011-12-10T16:04:00.000-08:00

We are getting fancy with our hats to keep our Luca baby's little head warm this winter!

Ella had her preschool Christmas Program at Stringfellow this week! She was an angel and SO adorable. She sang Little Grey Donkey, Mary Had a Baby Boy and Happy Birthday Jesus. She sang loud and proud and sucked her thumb in between songs--which even though I know she should be kicking the habit, I still thought it was adorable :)

That night we found out that Betsy and Ballard are picking up on her habit too...

(bottom row to the right) She asked me that morning if I could sit on the first row so no one was in front of me so I could see her and she could see me. I thought that was so sweet. So I went nearly an hour early and still got on the second row! But I could see her and she could see me...mission accomplished :)

after the program with her class!

at the reception...

ella and luca in their matching nommers. These two are my WORLD! They love each other so much. They hug, kiss, play and defend each other. They are a team :)

Family Pics!

2011-12-03T10:25:00.000-08:00

We had family pictures taken a while back! These were for Luca's 1 year and Ella's 4 year pictures. Just click HERE! Enter the website, click on clients, and the password is Reading (case sensitive). Some of my favorites are towards the end :)

It's the most wonderful time of the year!

2011-11-27T12:05:00.000-08:00

We just got home from our visit to Arkansas for Thanksgiving! It is always so good to go home. We are so thankful that our families live so close that we can always celebrate holidays and see them both when we go home. The only downside of our visit this year was that I didn't get to see my Granny and Grandpa :( My Granny has pneumonia so we are keeping her germ free so she can get to feeling better. But Christmas is just a few weeks away and we will be heading back!

On the road to my house, the botanical gardens had a fun sled that Ella wanted her picture in and beautiful lights. It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas!

We gathered enough holiday spirit when decorating Nana B and Papa Bo's Christmas tree so Santa dropped off our elves, Betsy and Ballard! This is the first year that Ella has really understood the elf thing and gets a kick out of it. Christmas is so much fun with kids. It brings out the child that is still in me :)

This year was our year to spend Thanksgiving Day at the Reading's. She was so excited to play with all of her cousins. Mimi and Pops live way out in the country and the kids absolutely exhausted themselves running and playing outside for 3 days straight. There is so much freedom and safety and they just go wild outside on the land! They both ended up sick by the time we got them home, but it was worth it. I love the weather in Arkansas. It actually feels like winter is on it's way! So homey and cozy.

Aunt Dee Dee and Uncle Andrew got the kiddies matching Christmas nommers :) Ella loves being with all of her cousins. She gets a cuddly sense of being an only child on my side and has a lots of Aunts, Uncles and cousins on the other side. Best of both worlds!

I accidentally dressed Luca in LSU colors on gameday, but we were really rooting for the Hogs...except for the Uncle Andrew (the ONLY non-Arkansas member of our family). :) Luca was annoyed by the yelling.

Christmas shopping is done early, wrapped and already in Arkansas. Now it's just time to enjoy the season and celebrate our Savior's birth!

Happy Halloween!

2011-11-07T07:42:00.000-08:00

This year for Halloween, Ella was a cupcake and Luca was a garden gnome :)

Ella was just the sweetest thing and it was just perfect for her. Her first birthday was a cupcake theme so I'm partial to those cupy-cakes :) She made it very clear to every one who opened their door that she was a cupcake with STRAWBERRY on top--not to be confused with the typical cherry on top.

Luca was the loveliest little lawn ornament I have ever seen. Made me want to grow a garden :) He rocked the beard! He wore it for 4 hours straight until the sun went down! He got lots and lots of attention and he was so proud. He tore up the pavement roaming neighbor hood non-stop.

Trick or Treat! The first stop before we headed off to McKinney was Nit's house of course!!!

He didn't stop for long...not even for the candy.

Trick or Treating in style with Nit and Terry! Now I want one of these!

We followed tradition this year and celebrated with our friends, the Rutigs, complete with my annual batch of white chicken chili and pumpkin crunch cake! Dessert was good, but next year I'll stick with my apple dumplins...there is a reason why they made the traditional menu. They are just SO good!

Ella ran door to door and even went through a neighborhood haunted house. We couldn't keep up with her! I remember as a child being so shy that I was too shy to mutter the words "trick or treat" when people came to the door...not this girl :)

The older Ella gets, I'm learning she is very much like her Mommy and Nana B. She loves holidays, festivities, parties, and celebrations :) She is SO MUCH FUN! She is already my little partner in crime. We are going to create all sorts of fun for ourselves together through the years...good times ahead :)

This dude never stopped walking so he made his way into plenty of people's homes as soon as they opened their door. All we had to do was point him in the direction and he took off!

When we got home, we handed out candy to the trick or treaters...Ella looooved this part.

That's a wrap!

pumpkin patch

2011-10-30T12:46:00.000-07:00

last year...

this year!

that little pumpkin on the right side is getting so big :( it was her idea to take a picture standing up next to luca and the pumpkin to show how tall she is. turned out adorable!

look how far we've come. Here is our precious ella avery at her first pumpkin patch...

and luca at his first pumpkin patch last year!

Our visit to the pumpkin patch was extra special this year! It is an old tradition in my family, but since I've moved away, had children and all my cousins have grown up as well, our tradition now is mom coming to Texas and us going to the pumpkin patch and carrying the tradition on with the kiddies. However, this year was different! We took a day trip to Tulsa for my Aunt Kim's 50th birthday (which was awesome) and so we were all together and able to go to the pumpkin patch as a family with the cousins again...minus 1 (we missed you blake)!

The cousins minus Blake :(

luca baby was SO excited about the mini pumpkins. he was beaming!

This hoss was hosting his own punkin chunkin contest. Anytime he could get his hands on one, it went flying through the air 2 seconds later! I think he might throw shot put in track someday :)

On a pony ride with Uncle ElJeffy...she was so excited because she got the pony she wanted...pink hair and a princess strapped on :) sounds about right for this girlie girl!

sooo excited!

Luca baby was tearing it up at the patch...he didn't stop for long despite the fact he hadn't taken one single nap all day! He's a party animal!

and a visit to the pumpkin patch would not be complete without a train ride! I love this picture of my mom and the kids...you have no idea how hard it is to get both of these little lovelies to look at the camera with a presentable expression at the SAME TIME! haha

face painting too of course. Ella chose a rainbow butterfly. she's so indecisive that she usually opts for "rainbow" when asked to choose her favorite color...gets it from her mama :)

After the patch, we all went to Starubucks for pumpkin spice lattes and halloween goodies!

We can't wait for Halloween and trick-or-treating!

Fall!

2011-10-25T18:52:00.000-07:00

Remember these old things?!? these were ella's halloween jommies!

see! lil miss ella bella...

sporting new fall boots compliments of nana b and papa bo!

cozying up together watching cartoons on a saturday morning. doesn't get any better...

luca and i went on a nice little walk one crisp fall morning while ella was at dance class...

and i got so tickled when i looked back and saw that he had made a nifty little foot rest and had kicked his feet up. ah the good life :)

Enjoying a nice fall day at the park...Luca thoroughly enjoying his first happy meal :)

We hit up Ella's fall festival at her preschool...lots of fun with friends, pumpkin crafts, face painting, cotton candy and playing!

Ella and her teacher Mrs. Ashley!

I also love fall for the fun fall projects, cooking and crafts :) Ella said she wanted to decorate her pumpkin instead of carving it so we took her up on that offer!

Nit gave Ella and Luca their own mini pumpkins. Ella made hers a witch and decorated Luca's like a cat. She thought he'd like that. She's so sweet!

WE LOVE ALL THINGS FALL!!! (although I do have to say I'm having withdrawals from the beautiful trees and weather in Arkansas...home sweet home!)

Time For Tea With Ella Avery!

2011-10-16T10:56:00.000-07:00

Four. Years. Old. Where does the time go?

one...

two...

three...

FOUR!!!

We had a tea party this year. My girlie girl is into everything fru fru these days so a tea party was perfect for our mademoiselle ella avery :)

We had tea, tea sandwiches, chocolate soup, cake, dress up, make up and a fashion show!

Happy birthday to you...

Her candles sparkled when lit...I should have known better! She loves sparkly things but wasn't so sure of the sparking fire candles. (she's still not over the burned foot fire craker incident this year haha).

friends...

party favors...

presents!

ella is still talking about her daddy dressing up in the purple dress. She was and still is so proud that her daddy did that! What a guy :) she's a lucky girl.

the fabulous birthday hat compliments of Aunt Kim!!!

working the runway...

you go girls!

little luca got in on the dress up fun to :) he LOVES hats!

happy birthday ella bella!!!

luca the sailor man

2011-10-05T16:47:00.001-07:00

I'm Luca the sailor man,

I'm Luca the sailor man...

I'm strong to the finich, cause I eats me spinich,

I'm Luca the sailor man!

TOOT TOOT!

new beginnings

2011-09-25T10:56:00.000-07:00

This is a season of new beginnings for our family. We've been through quite a few stressful events lately in every single aspect of our lives. We are at the end of it all (I think) and we are seeing healing and the light at the end of the tunnel and we are better because of it, but we still have some really hard days. Most people know some of the things we've been through and very few know everything. It really doesn't even matter. I can't quite explain this season, but the best way I know how is this...as soon as we felt like we had hit rock bottom and the only place to go was up, the floor would fall out from underneath us again and we would have to redefine what rock bottom was. We have seen some of our darkest days lately. One thing after the other. It's been trying and exhausting and scary. So we have turned over a new leaf declaring the start of this school year as a new beginning leaving the shenanigans (and the fear, anger, stress, sadness it brings) behind us. I know it has purpose and meaning in our lives. I know that God is working on many things. I haven't been able to find comfort in this the whole time, but now I'm seeing it. I have to admit, I struggle with anxiously waiting for the next ball to drop. I feel as though if I were to step outside during a storm, I would be the one lightening would strike haha. No but really, we are settling down and getting some of the wind back in our sails. With the healing has also come many blessings to us individually and to our marriage and family. I know this season of our life has purpose and is leading to wonderful things. We've had glimpses of it! But wow, it's been tough. Some of our new beginnings are firsts for our family, and the rest is just a life with a new perspective and appreciation---and maybe a little less naivety :) which oddly enough brings more happiness and joy to knowing and understanding how truly blessed we are. I know what is important. I know who is important. I have a much better discretion of the things that deserve my time, worry, attention and care. Here is what I do know...absolutely nothing can steal the joy I get from my little lovelies!!!

So here's what we've been up to lately! We have been everywhere doing a little bit of everything! Birthday parties, outings, friends, service projects in the community, school, crafting, decorating, visits from family and wishing in the fall season :)

We've just been laying low lately and taking it easy. We've eased into another school year and Ella and I are off to a wonderful start! It's been a super easy beginning to this year, probably the easiest yet. Ella has settled in too and is loving it. I think we have all found our stride and are ready to shake things up with the approaching holiday season!

my favorite little dude rocking his fedora :) isn't he darling? thank you Aunt Tesha and Uncle David!

Ok I'll start us off with Ella's first solo go kart ride! She rocked it :) and by "rocking it" I mean she didn't cry which was a shocker to us all. I was so proud! She tried something new and didn't cry! As wild as she is, she's been a little skiddish lately :)

However she drove so slow that her go kart was literally squeaking when she turned the wheel. If you listen closely you can hear it...hahaha

count how many seconds it takes my pokey princess to stroll across the screen on her go cart :)

party on wayne!

my two favorite guys...this is one of my top 10 favorite pics because here are the two men i love the most looking like little clones! ella is looking a lot like her daddy too these days, as always!

him in all his cuteness.

ella and layla, on layla's birthday. little sweeties :)

ta ta for now!

my little lady

2011-09-16T09:57:00.000-07:00

Ella is back for year 2 of dance! She loved it so much and asked all summer when she could go back and see Mrs. Melva. Ella has a lot of new little girls in her class this year and on her first day back, she got to be the leader to show them the ropes! This was super fun for me to watch because I don't know if you remember my "runaway swan" post from when she started dance class last year...but let's just say she's come a long way :) I love watching her participate in things she enjoys and takes pride in. Here she is showing the class how to sit like a dancer...

If you turn the music off at the bottom you can hear the video better. It's pretty sweet. My sweet Ella was asked the color of her butterfly and of course she chose rainbow ;)

I love that Mrs. Melva teaches the girls dance through stories, manners through dance, and that GOD gave them them their gift! Win win win!

Ella goes to preschool!

2011-09-07T20:01:00.000-07:00

Ella is going to preschool! This a first for her and for me! I still see her as my baby so these days are exciting and surreal all at the same time. She was so excited. It is at a Methodist church right behind our house so she sees it every day and it is all we've heard about from her for months! The girl wanted to go to school. I always thought I'd just wait until Kindergarten, and let her be a baby for as long as possible, but this girl was ready. She still gets to see her beloved Nit 2 days a week so that is good. She loves her so.

This is her teacher, Mrs. Ashley at meet the teacher!

in her room on the first day!

No tears on the first day (except for maybe a few from me at some random time in the day when it hit me all at once...my baby girl is a preschooler!) She rocked it. She couldn't get there fast enough and she didn't have one single nerve--further confirming she was so ready. Knowing this helped me a lot.

This picture shows how excited she was...

and this picture shows how mischievous she can be. We will see which side of Ella comes out at school :) as a teacher myself, I am super curious about this!

she literally danced her way down the street to preschool...

Her first day was a huge success. She fell apart at the end of the day at recess getting in line because someone took her spot. I was just glad she was melting down about it rather than decking him in the face...which is what she did to her friend at Nit's house when she wouldn't help her clean up :) Again, I am praying and researching that I will have the smarts and wisdom to steer her strong will, confidence and stubbornness for all the right things :) she is such a strong person and i just know she will go on to do great things. we love you ella bella!

Pretty Pretty Princess

2011-08-27T17:09:00.000-07:00

Back in college, with all my sorority girls (oh how i miss the chi-o days), I had two nicknames. My girls referred to me as Bo. I wasn't ever really Amber, I was Bo. This is what they called me (my maiden name is Bohannan). And then somehow, in addition, I ended up with the nickname/"title": triple p...which stands for pretty pretty princess. :) it was a running running joke, but i guess maybe i was a tad prissy? i don't know! i'm sure they'd have plenty to share to throw me under the bus. somehow i "earned" it i guess. but TRUST ME things have changed :) mommyhood will do that!

All that to say, I hereby pass the torch...

and gladly hand my "title" over ...

to my very own pretty pretty princess in the making :)

my littlest lovely is 1!!!!

2011-08-21T20:57:00.000-07:00

and what a lovely year it was!

when ella was a baby, i was her favorite. i was your favorite too for the longest time. but right now, ella is your favorite. i have some major competition!

-the first thing when you say when you wake up in the morning/from a nap is ella (about 20 times)

-when you got your shots at the doctor, you cried for ella.

-on your first birthday when you got to dig into cake for the first time and realized how yummy it was, you called for ella.

-when ella leaves the room, you follow. if you don't see where she went, you walk everywhere yelling, "ella ella ella ella"!!!!

you get a little more pitiful when mommy is around. it's a little confusing. i never want to blow off anything you may feel or that could be hurting, but it's hard to know because you just ~~get a little more sensitive~~ cry all the time when i'm around!

you walk everywhere and are working on a run.

you are a picky eater!!!!!!! but you LOVE lasagna...like--you can eat an adult sized portion, and scream when it's gone. because of this, i've started to call you my little meatball :)

you aren't super hefty anymore! you still have your big bowed chest and muscular little body...but you don't weigh all that much and are not very tall---40th percentile for height and 49th for weight.

you know what thing's pertain to the word "no no", but we aren't quite sure you know what no no means. you'll walk up to the technology appliances, curtains, outlets, and fireplace and shake your head back and forth and say "nononononon"....as you climb on them and push their buttons and do all the "nono's"

This seems like just yesterday. It all goes by so fast. This was 3 weeks before I had you. Honey, you were huge...therefore, so was I. Acutally, I'm still paying for that. But I'd do it a thousand times again!

i just can't imagine you not being in our lives and can't remember a time when it felt like you weren't here, even before you actually were. just know you are loved and perfect in our eyes. we love you so much luca baby. thank you for the joy you have brought to our lives this past year.

to this day, I can still see every single face you have in these pictures. i'm so thankful i have them!

(i see so much of ella in this one)

you are some kind of wonderful, love. i can't wait to see what this next year holds.

Time Flies

2011-08-18T19:55:00.000-07:00

the invite

My oh my how the time does fly, how could one year have already gone by? Luca, you turned ONE! How can this be? You have brought the most indescribable joy to our lives. Your sister adores you, but I think you love her even more if this is possible. Celebrating you and your beautiful life on this day was so incredibly sweet. It came just at the right time. We had been through so much in the recent days which made this day even more of a blessing. We went home for Ella's birthday which means we had ALL of our family, but we decided to have your birthday at our home. We missed them desperately:( But regardless, it was a beautiful day. HAPPY BIRTHDAY LUCA BABY! You couldn't possibly be more loved.

The coloring terminal and building your own airplane...

passport to fun coloring book!

jet fuel...

the fueling station complete with pilot cookies, turbulent twists, cockpit crispies, aero brownies, whirly twirly cloud puffs, and first class cupcakes!

baggage claim...

here is my sweet little birthday boy. this was the sweetest day celebrating him. we couldn't possibly love him more!

ella was so thrilled for luca on his big day and wanted to make it known that SHE was the big sister of the birthday boy :)

nana b and her babies :) papa bo was still in alaska :(

and the most wonderful aunt kim who flew in to make it to our baby's big day!

one big happy family. i felt so complete this day.

mimi, pops, uncle andrew, aunt dee, and soon to be cousin wyatt!!!

playing with pops...

mommy and mimi...

presents! luca was a little over stimulated. basically, after the airplane and the drums, I opened his presents and he played with them on the side by himself :) ella is definitely our party girl and i think luca may be a little more chillaxed :)

oh baby, your mommy and daddy love you so. i feel as though you've always been here with us!

just like when we took you to your birthday dinner, you got so excited when we sang happy birthday to you! you smiled so big and i could tell from the most precious look on your face that you felt SO special. mission accomplished :)

singing loudly and cake is coming! your sister asked if she could have the honor of blowing out your candle since you would need a little help :) you guys are quite the little team.

first taste of cake---you loved it!

mmmmmmm.....

then, you called out "ELLA ELLA ELLA ELLA!" so you could share your yummy cake with her. i mean, how sweet is that? i will remember it forever.

party on!

firsts

2011-08-09T08:14:00.000-07:00

luca has had a couple of "firsts" lately! we decided it was time for his first hair cut to get all spiffy for his FIRST birthday :) We are growing his hair out, but it was starting to get a little shaggy so we just shaped it up a bit.

this is the before.

i love that he's admiring himself in the mirror. it's almost like he's telling us "i'm so cute already! who needs a haircut?"

he wasn't so sure about the spray down...

trim trim trim, snip snip snip!

and there is my handsome boy!

Friday was his actual first birthday! Mimi and Pops spent the day with the kids so my mom and I could get ready for the big party :) (party pics coming soon!) Papa Bo is still in Alaska, but he will be home this Friday! We took a little time out Friday night to go to dinner at Razoos. This was where we took little miss on her first birthday too...memories :)

he got the biggest smile on his face when they came to sing to him and gave him his dessert :) he did the same thing at the party. so cute--he knows he's a big deal :)

our angel baby

2011-08-02T11:03:00.000-07:00

this blog is mainly about our babies, including our third. this isn't what i want to be updating on. it should be something completely opposite, but it's not. this is not a dramatization, this is real life devastation. maybe i was just so ignorant and naive before, but i never could have imagined this kind of pain. but i feel comfortable sharing mine with you because a few friends that have been through it personally said they felt the exact same way and it wasn't until it happened to them that anyone spoke up about their experience and what it's truly like. not to mention, it is healing for me to get this off my chest for others to know if they want to. but i don't want to relive it over and over, so this is what it is.
on friday we went to the doctor, excited and relieved for a couple reasons. 1, it marked the beginning of our 2nd trimester, past the "worry if you'll just miscarry" stage. 2, this also means you will start to physically feel better and have more energy. as of that morning, in our minds, the hard part was over. we were expecting to find out whether our baby was a boy or a girl. instead we found out our baby was an angel baby.
as worried as a was and as much as i analyzed everything the entire way through my first trimester, i truly did not believe anything was wrong. we saw our baby alive, we saw and heard the "perfect" little heartbeat. i was growing, having all of the normal pregnancy symptoms, no bleeding, no cramping...flawless. i am a worrier by nature, especially when it comes to my babies, so it's hard for me to decipher between intuition and worry when it comes to pregnancy, ella, luca, and our angel baby. 99% of the time, it always turns out to be worry. so i chose to trust my body and all of the "perfect" checkups we had.
i'll never forget the way it went down. we were driving...making our last minute predictions. we all thought it was a girl. i was planning out my speech to convince mike to let me do a little shopping to pick out a little something special depending on whether it was blue or pink.
we got there. the nurse came in to get us started and said she would just play and look around for us before the doctor got there. she turned the machine on and there was our baby. it looked just like a baby, but it was just laying there with it's back towards us, no moving, and no pulsating flashes on the screen for a heartbeat. she took a couple measurements, told us the doctor would be right in, and ~~left~~ darted out of the room. i knew what i saw, but still didn't believe. especially since i was very much growing, feeling pregnant, and had no other symptoms of miscarrying. then the doctor came in, took my hand, and said that he was so sorry. what he was seeing was a fetus measuring about 8 1/2 weeks...with no heartbeat. that means that the baby died at 9 1/2 weeks...we were nearly 3 weeks past that. i have been carrying our dead baby around for 3 weeks thinking everything was fine. i was so mad at my body. then mike and i are in tears, mike looking for a place to vomit, ella hiding behind the curtain because she was so scared at our reaction, luca happy as a clam looking for cords to pull on, and then ella crying because she wanted to see the baby. we had to think quickly right then and there about what to say to her, because she had no intention of leaving that room without seeing her baby. we left, i vomited in the parking lot, so distraught we drive to mckinney before realizing that is the opposite direction of where we live, we find someone to take the kids for us, and we finish out the day with doctor visits. to sum it up...HORRIFIC. losing a baby is never ever good news, or easy, but the timing, the situation, the circumstances, and the delivery was not the best way of learning this.
my body was hanging on to the baby, so we had to have a d&c scheduled for monday. we later learned why, but up until yesterday, i felt so betrayed by my body for not telling me what it is supposed to. i was not ok with the fact that after 6 weeks and a heartbeat is detected, our chances of miscarrying were less than 10% and ours died at 9 1/2. the fact that it "just happens" and we could have more is of NO consolation to me. THIS IS MY BABY AND I WANT THIS BABY. i never realized how deeply i loved our babies from the very first moment, during pregnancy, even in the first trimester...until i had to let go of one. it doesn't feel "sad" like i always thought it would feel if god forbid it every happened. i feel like i lost a child that i knew and loved and it's more like devastating. i saw ella and luca at that very same week and through them, i know good and well what that beautiful soul was supposed to be.
i have had so many wonderful and supportive friends who have been here daily. some of them have gone through similar things themselves. and they all have justified what i feel and the ones that have been through it have been able to verbalize exactly what i can't describe yet. that is so refreshing. you will just never know unless you are forced into this terrible club. my mother in law sent me this verse that i've read 1,000 times, but never from this new perspective of mine...
"for you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. i praise you for i am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, i know that full and well. my frame was not hidden from you when i was made in the secret place. when i was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be." this verse means that even in the womb, our baby had a life, a soul, and a place in heaven no matter how long it lived. and we will meet it some day. i feel the need to defend our angel baby just in case someone doesn't realize this---it was a child, it was alive, it had a soul, and we love it just the same, and it will always be our child. it was here and now it's in heaven. it IS a big deal to us and i'm afraid our child will be "minimalized" just because it never got to be born. i don't know why this frightens me so, maybe it's normal. we have 3 children. two here with us, and one angel baby in heaven.
when you miscarry unexpectedly at home, it's happening. it's not any better, but it's happening. friday we received news, and my surgery wasn't until monday, we were stuck in the moment for 3 days, not being able to say it happened and look ahead. it happened, but it wasn't finished. and we had a surgery to face. while morning our loss, we were also dealing with anger about having to have the surgery. it just seems so vulgar and unnatural. not to mention, i had to sit around knowing i was only getting to carry it for only a couple more days and then knowing it wouldn't be pregnant with it anymore. dead or alive, no one wants to feel like someone is taking their baby away from them. that is what i feel like. i wanted so badly for it to just happen naturally in the privacy of my own home. i prayed all weekend for that. knowing what i know now (we'll share more about that later) i'm SO glad that prayer wasn't answered. would have been very dangerous. then i personally was dealing with fear of the surgery. for every control freak like me out there, i would bet to say not having control over going to sleep or waking up is enough to send shivers down your spine. i have serious anxiety issues about this and i walked around all weekend stuck in the fact that our baby died, also looking at my other two precious children wondering how much time i had left with them! it's ok to chuckle. i too knew this to be a little ridiculous, but it didn't make the fear any better. i do have to say, if i'm going to look for the positives, my drug induced high was quite refreshing. i know it was a false sense of happiness, but i didn't feel anything, and it was nice :) now the surgery is done. now it is "finished". it happened. there's nothing else to face. it can't possibly get any worse than those agonizing days. as crappy as i feel about all this and as bad as today has been, i compare it to yesterday and it could never be worse than that. perspective. so now that we can say it is officially over which means we are just now getting to focus of grieving alone, physical healing, and then eventually emotional healing.
can i just say i have never been more in love with ella and luca. i've always been absolutely nuts over them...obviously. but i have a new appreciation, or maybe a new found respect and admiration, for what was given to me! i have sunshine on every cloudy day. my home is noisy with baby laughs and cries and ella bossing everyone around. i have diapers to change, spit up to clean up, booties to wipe, 1000 loads of laundry a week to do, an empty bank account spent solely on childcare and ever growing shoes and clothes, a messy house full of crumbs to vacuum and toys to clean up. never realized what a blessing that was.
i am not ignorant of the fact that i can have safe and healthy pregnancies and babies. i can make them, i can carry them, i can birth them. i'm very thankful for that. but it doesn't take away the loss that we are mourning. it doesn't make this loss any better. have i said how much i want this baby? not A baby, THIS baby. i'm so thankful to have ella and luca who is still a baby himself to love on until we welcome our next little lovely. more than anything, i'm thankful that mike is MY husband. he has been nothing short of amazing and he is hurting too. sharing this loss together has deeply impacted, strengthened, and oddly blessed our relationship and marriage. we are both blown away at how many people have reached out to us and just seem to care. it helps so much to know that there are people that share this with us and we feel very justified in our feelings and what we are experiencing. we have a journey ahead but i know it will get better. we will have some more answers in the near future. we are not defeated, but are a little shell shocked and stunned. i'm looking forward to dreaming and planning for more happy times ahead, but for now, we are just sad and heart broken. so we will deal with that first.

my lovely little lady

2011-07-27T19:25:00.000-07:00

I have a lovely little lady...

she is this many...

she is charming and delightful...

a little sassy too sometimes...

did you hear her?

she said she's this many...

she loves all things rainbow, sparkly, and "bootiful".

she tells her mama she is gorgeous all the time :)

she is an absolute ham in front of the camera and drama in front of the mirror.

she's beautiful inside and out.

even when she's pouting, she's still adorable...

a true gem, there's no one like her...

i love everything about her! i am soooo proud to be her mama. i just know that God gave her this enormously strong and sparkly personality for a reason. i've always said she's like a fire cracker---strong and beautiful, but could be dangerous if not handled with care :) i pray for the wisdom and guidance as her mama to show her how to use it for good things. a strong will can take you far! i can't wait to see what this lovely little lady becomes.

My littlest lovely-11 months!

2011-07-11T08:19:00.000-07:00

Luca you are 11 months! I'm a little late on my post because I just can't bring myslef to cover the 11th month. You know why? Because that means next month we will celebrate your FIRST BIRTHDAY! Those dang birthdays are always so hard for mama. I'm a little more experienced this time, so hopefully I don't completely melt down like I did for Ella's first...and second...and third. HA! It won't be the first time your crazy mother embarrases you sweet boy ;)

The biggest milestone to report: you can walk!!! Just a few days after you turned 11 months, you took a couple of steps. Later that night, you took a few more. The next day, you were up to 8! And now you are getting a little braver. I have a feeling you'll be walking around on your first birthday. You're words are: mama, dada, ella, nana, mimi, papa, and "pos"/pops.

Even though you are approaching 1, you still seem to be very much a baby. When Ella turned one, we saw toddlerhood quickly approaching. She was ready to ditch the bottle, she was drinking whole milk, she was eating enough table food to survive, she could feed herself. Little Miss Independent I guess you could say. Seeing how fast it all flew by, I'm totally ok if you just stay baby a little longer.

What am I doing on this blog? I've got some party planning to do!!!

Sweet Summer

2011-07-07T19:20:00.000-07:00

Summer time is so sweet for many reasons (the Texas heat not being one of them)...late evenings, long sunny days, no make up, no work, free floating schedule, snow cones, water, friends, trips, naps---basically, just being lazy and having fun!

my absolute favorites...

American Girl Boutique!!!

2011-07-05T19:36:00.000-07:00

Mimi came to take the girls to the American Girls Boutique! I'm not sure who had more fun, me or the girls :) They each got to pick out their doll and an outfit. Then we had tea time with our dolls! Kenzie named hers Zoe. Cute right? Well, Ella named hers Kathy Jones. HA! She has also named many of her other animals/toys "Kathy Jones", so we have been exploring other options for this lovely little doll :)

Mimi and her girls :-)

Making party hats for the dolls...

I can't wait to go back and play some more! I mean, for Ella of course... ;)

Home Sweet Arkansas

2011-06-30T08:42:00.000-07:00

When your making the drive back home and all of the sudden you see THIS...that's when you know you're home :)

First we stopped to stay with Mike's family, then mine, then we took off to Oklahoma to spend some time with my Aunt and Uncle...long standing tradition since I was just a little girl! I have so many pics I'll just stop talking now. But to sum it all up: family, home, cozy, fun, friends celebrations, heart warming :) There's no place like home!

Uncle David's 30th Bday--making up for lost time with the cousins!

My mom turned FIFTY! So we celebrated her in style at a Fifty Nifty and Fabulous surprise party (pics of that later). I've gotta hunt some down!

this is our redneck pool ;)

luca's first snow cone!

zoo!

tea time! Ella had her first tea party, Aunt Kim style. Me? I'm a weathered veteran ;)

Our trip is never long enough and we never get to see everyone we want to in the same trip, but we sure try!

duckie babes

2011-06-25T19:11:00.000-07:00

Ella use to make this adorable little duck face...

and now this one does too!

They both started doing this at the exact same age...10 months. How funny is that? Except when Luca makes his, it seems as though he's hitting us up for some sugars ;) MMMMWAH!

My littlest lovely- 10 months!

2011-06-10T05:52:00.001-07:00

Oh. My. Goodness. Is it really time to start planning your FIRST birthday party? I have savored every month and moment of your first year after learning how fast they all go by from your big sister. You are still very much a baby. my baby. our baby. But you are growing growing growing!

Let's see, where do I start? You are working on new words...

You don't play it safe with ANYTHING...except water. You are not a fan of water outside the bathtub. We played with all of our water toys in the backyard and you finally worked up the courage to play with a bucket that had water in it. But other than that, you sat safely on the dry blanket in the shade. Next month we are going to work on getting you into a baby pool ;)

You have the BEST big sister in the world. She absolutely adores you...most of the time.

You guys have started to be able to play together and I think pretty soon, you will be on her team instead of mine :0) But I have to warn you little guy, you are going to have your hands full with her!

A few more highlights:

- You're a much better eater than Ella was. I don't worry about you choking all the time.

- You have 4 teeth and are working on the 5th and 6th.

- STRANGER DANGER!!! Dropping you off at the church nursery has all the sudden become a

big deal. You are still much easier going though than your sister was about it all when she was

little.

-Your trademarks: we all know about the hair! And those eyes, those lashes, those lips!

-And your just so stinkin cute ;)

Here are some fun pics of Ella Avery at 10 months to compare!

the next two are the only two that I really see the resemblances in...

(I now know this to be a dirty look)

summer has arrived!!!

2011-06-02T10:19:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow is the last day of school-and a half day at that-and I am absolutely ECSTATIC!!! I can't wait to chill, play, sleep, party all summer long. We haven't signed either kids up for anything and we are just planning to be nomads. We are just going to see when and where we end up from day to day this summer. Very refreshing. :)

We started off on memorial day at the Coppell water park with Ella, Luca, Kenzie, and her baby brother Wyatt (in utero).

This was Luca's first time in the swimming pool. As you can see it went over very well ;) He loves baths and is not afraid of anything so far, but I'll be adding this to the list! He started crying as soon as he laid eyes on the pool and it didn't get any better. Maybe his was just frightened by his Dad's hairy monster legs?
So he spent a lot of time here...but still not amused!

After a while we did get him in the water...kind of. He was fine as long as he was being held to my chest, both little hands clenched around my arms, and face in my neck. If a toe hit the water, he just inched up even higher. It was actually kind of cute-but I'm pretty sure I have his imprint as a tan line on my front side.

Ella Bella's Dancing Debut!

2011-05-30T13:38:00.000-07:00

My sweet Ella Bella has been transformed from the run away swan (as seen on video from the beginning of dance class) to a beautiful little performer :) First we had rehearsal...I was excited to put all of her sequined tutu and accessories on her but I was REALLY excited to put on her make-up. I'm talking stage make-up...lots and lots of make-up!

Mommy are you still watching?

Our recital was at the majestic...so beautiful inside!

Such a sweet little cupycake :) In her recital, she was a baker. She danced to a song called "Jumbalaya". As we were arriving, her nerves were setting in and she got a stomach ache. And she snapped into a VERY funky mood.

I took her backstage and she was screaming at the top of her lungs demanding Dr. Pepper and ice cream. I want a little something like this, "I. WANT. DRPEPPER AND ICE CREAM! GIVE ME SOME DR PEPPER AND IIIIICCCCEEEE CREAAAAAAAAMMMMMM!!!" Not gonna lie...it wasn't pretty. I wasn't so sure I'd see her on stage when her song came up. I told her that i'd give her Dr. Pepper and ice cream after the show if she'd be a good girl and let mommy go and dance pretty. She didn't let me go, I had to make a get away escape, but she did dance pretty...and proud :)

That's a very big stage for such a little girl! When the curtains rolled back and her class was skipping onto stage to take their places, she was there! Smiling, happy, and dancing. When people started oohing and ahhing over the little cuties, she danced a little harder and smiled very proudly. She stopped mid song to organize some of the props to put them in there designated spot on the stage and then finished the song out and waved at her Daddy.

Kate came with me to help me pick her up on stage after the finale and she gave her a big hug. Then she looked at me and said, "where's my flowers?" She had added flowers to her list of demands from earlier in the show.

Her bestie was there to deliver and gave Ella a big ole bundle of flowers. We took her home and got her Dr. Pepper and ice cream. I thought I had it covered, but as we were putting her to bed, she asked for a trophy haha. Have you read the children's book "If You Give a Pig a Pancake"? If you have you'll know what I mean :)

It brought back so many memories from my very own dance recitals! Not much has changed in the dance world...except you aren't allowed to record your own videos :(

I love having a little girl :) These two are just presh!

I can't wait until next year!

lately...

2011-05-21T11:15:00.000-07:00

We've just been taking it easy. Easy living is the life for me. We've had quiet weekends at home and landed with friends here and there. I am keeping it chill for the next couple of weeks until...summer break! Every year goes by faster but being on maternity leave for the first part of this year made it zoom by! Here is what we've been up too lately...

buds...i mean, dudes.

beautiful-just beautiful

cool, cloudy days at the park...enjoying spring before the beating Texas heat :/

fun days at a community event called BOUNCE!

kite flying at the duck pond...

my poor luca was the "shady" looking kid at the park haha.

we've taken LOTS of naps lately. Luca has been extra cranky for some reason. But I remember taking Ella to the doctor around this age just knowing something was seriously wrong, only to be gently informed that she was just throwing fits :) so i think that is what's going down here.

such a wild sleeper just like Ella Bella used to do in her crib!

she's got a look of her own :)

peek a boo!

sassy britches!

9 lovely little months

2011-05-13T17:46:00.001-07:00

Word from the doc at his 9 month app:

21 lbs-60th percentile

27.8 inches- 30th percentile

he's perfect :)

I once saw this definition of "boy" and it went a little something like this:

***BOY-noun-prounounced: b-oi

meaning: 1) a noise with dirt on it
2) the wildest animal of all
3) most precious to their mothers

And that is pretty much the t-total beautiful truth. You are so noisy---do all boys scream at the tops of their lungs for every single emotion they experience? This is new to me. You love to make messes and get into EV-ER-Y-THING...curtains, bathtubs, toilets, cabinets, furniture, plugs (don't worry we have protectors), showers, the cable box, the internet router, the remote, (notice a technology theme here?), closets, windows, pantry, blinds, bookshelves, the FIREPLACE. You are a magnet to all things dangerous and you are so intrigued. I just know you are trying to figure out how to fly. I think this is the stage where we start to see the clear differences of having a boy versus our dainty, play it safe, tidy, little girl :) You train yourself every day to get better at standing up. It's your goal in life right now. I swear, you started crawling (forward) a couple weeks ago and then days later you were pulling up and trying to set sail! You are wild, you are crazy, you are fearless, (just a tad sensitive haha), you are handsome, you are ALL BOY!!! And I am so in love with you.

With all of these new "inspirations" come a lot more boo boos :( You cry so much harder and longer about the tiniest little bumps than your sister ever did! I think it's cute. Teething too...that seems to be rough on you. That's not so cute, just sad :(

You can also wave and say bye bye now and you have your top 2 teeth (4 total)! Whew, busy month.

Sweet Cousins

2011-05-03T19:54:00.000-07:00

I had a cousin as a bestie growing up, and still do to this day...I'm so glad Ella has the same :)

Kimberly (Ernie) and I (Bert) were both only children, we were the same age, and we lived just a couple houses down from each other. These two girls are 2 weeks apart, they both have little brothers, and they are the only Texans in the family! They have so much in common. Watching these girls brings back a lot of memories and it makes my heart happy!

I hope they always have what Kimberly and I had...love you Ernie!

Spring!!!

2011-05-03T19:38:00.000-07:00

BiRtHdAy PaRtIeS!!!

omg...baby pigs...I threw the biggest fit in junior high because I just didn't understand why my parents would let me have a baby pot belly pig! I'm talking weeks of begging, pleeing, bribing, convincing, and possibly even crying. Much to my sadness, Ella was not a pig fan. Notice she has her arms safely tucked behind her back. Little does she know, I'm still not over it and if she asked me today, I'd buy the girl a pig :)

and here, I'm clearly trying to work up the courage to catch the dad-gum pig haha

my little mother hen feeding baby goats!

bunnies

and baby ducks! Note to self...petting zoo birthdays are C-O-O-L!!!

ThUnDeRsToRmS!!!

(which means lots of indoor cozy fun while big sister hides in closets)

uh, lookin a bit like your mama...

luca loves being a little brother...he's so good at it. he loves watching ella and making every attempt to keep up with her. i have a feeling he'll be playing lots of barbies, dress up, and baby dolls in his day. he's a sensitive dude...he'll be alright :)

EaStEr!!!

spring rain showers=indoor egg hunts

We heart spring!!!

mamarazzi

2011-04-26T18:25:00.001-07:00

I think I've become the parental equivalent of the paprazzi and have respectively earned the mamarazzi title. My biggest fear is that they'll grow up and I'll forget that one face or hair-do or moment! I'm also a super scrappy mama who loves to scrapbook all these photos in my spare time. That is...when I'm not stalking my babies with my camera of course ;)

One of the things I want to remember about this boy is the HAIR! gotta love this do...

now if this doesn't make you smile on a bad day, I'm not sure what will!

His hair has made a statement about him since the day he was born--from the swirl in the front to the spike in the back. His personality wears it well :)

and this one too haha!

i just love her...

and here is the little (ok big) stud in his big boy carseat!!! I didn't really want to make the transition just because I still want him to be my tiny little baby, but let's face it, he was never tiny and he'll always be my baby :) he loves it. he screams and squeels the whole time he's in it!

And here are a few pics from our quiet Easter day at home. We can't wait to get to Arkansas next weekend and celebrate with FAMILY!!!

pretty bunny!

funny bunny!

stop and smell the roses

2011-04-22T16:19:00.000-07:00

Our friends had a "stop and smell the roses" party. They have it once a year when their roses bloom! We had so much fun, I don't really think we should wait another year to do it! It was the PERFECT most beautiful spring evening.

See the sign their son made? It says "Happy Glo Glushes" because it rhymes with "happy Rose Bushes"...gotta love 4 year old humor ;)

Luca was happy on his little blanket but even happier rolling in the grass...boys!

Happy Spring!

the boy needs a dog!

2011-04-18T08:24:00.000-07:00

snips, snails, and puppy dog tails, that's what little boys are made of!

this little dude needs a dog...

(scroll to the very bottom to turn the music off to get a load of this precious laughter!)

melt. my. heart.

life is beautiful

2011-04-13T09:33:00.000-07:00

luca's first crawling steps...

notice I had to video him crawling from the rear side as I hide behind the coffee table--if i don't and he sees his mama, this is what we get...

and here is my tiny little dancer.

life is beautiful!

Pink Hearts Fund

2011-04-09T07:18:00.000-07:00

On Friday, I donated two 12" ponytails to the Pink Hearts Fund. The Pink Hearts Fund is an amazing organization that makes wigs for adults and children who have completely lost their hair, have radiation burns, or have even just lost a little hair. The best part is, they give their wigs away for free. Cancer has hit too close to home for my family this year, so I was so excited to be a part of this day at my school. It has taken place every year since I've been working here, but it has a whole new meaning and importance to me now. When something as ugly as cancer strikes in your family, you go through it together as a family. So we did this together...even little Luca. And we participated in helping those with cancer in some way together. So this one is for YOU Granny! We love you!!!

We started the morning off with pink donuts for pink hearts day :)

Before...

During...

After!

It was a very special day to be able to do this and make a difference and speak out against cancer in some way. It is such an ugly disease and it is so difficult watch someone you love so deeply have to battle it when there is nothing you can do. But cutting off my long locks is something I CAN do!

You can click HERE to see the news footage.

my littlest lovely- 8 months

2011-04-06T16:20:00.001-07:00

To quickly sum you up at 8 months, I would just have to say...stud muffin. You're so stinkin cute. But there is no "quickly summing it up" when it comes to my sweet babes so this is what you are up to this month...

You were dedicated at our church! We had family in town to celebrate with us and it was a sweet time. Since we don't live super close to our family, it is always extra special and means a lot when they come. Here was your slide!

catchin up with Pops...

ella driving nana b and luca around in her pillow car...

Highlights: You are saying Mama on demand! Mommy is your favorite. You get super giddy in the mornings as soon as you find Mommy. We are pretty much in love :)You cut your first tooth AND the second one just a week later...both on the bottom...very cute :)

You are sleeping like a CHAMP!

You are a screamer.

You like to smooch...mmmmwah!

We found baby food that you like. Of course it's more expensive. It just so happens to be called "Ella's Kitchen" so it makes it a little less painful to buy :) That's ok baby, I'll buy you gormet mush any day even if it was my last dollar...big boys need to eat!

You can't crawl yet, BUT...

You can literally hop to your knees (as seen in previous post).

You can hold a yoga position...

You can push up and hold a push up position for quite some time...belly off the floor and all! You're such a hoss I wouldn't be surprised if you were doing pushups before you were walking hehe ;)

You can push up off the floor to a sitting position...All that but no crawling yet!

And you still tug at our heartstrings with your precious pouty lip.

some more shameless bragging

2011-04-04T17:12:00.001-07:00

First I have to say that I am one proud mama. I think that is obvious! I have so many pictures and they don't always fit into a post, so every now and then, an entire post of pictures and shameless bragging is called for :) My lovelies are my favorite...my pretty one, my tiny one, AND the hunky one that is taking our picture ;) love you babe! Why do I call them my lovelies? Because these little souls make our lives beautiful and lovely in every way.

Luca, I love you because you are...

pouty

you are spikey...

kinda wild sometimes...

you are pretty...

I could put a bow in your hair and call you Lila and no one would know you were a little fella ;)Ella, I love you because you are...

creative

sassy aka too big for your britches :)

beautiful inside and out...

you are social...you are a friend to all...you are the life of the party...and if there isn't a party going on, you'll get one started =D

Flashback Friday

2011-04-01T06:05:00.001-07:00

I went back in time on the blog looking for a certain picture of Baby Ella that reminds me of Luca and I came across some of my favorites :) Here is Ella Bella at 9-10 months! When look at these, I feel like I'm looking at last week's blog post. Seriously! It's just a good reminder to CHERISH EVERY SECOND of their little lives. They don't stay the same for long!

Just and average low key day at the park...with a tiara on ;) She has always been the princess!

This is the picture I was looking for. Although this is a bit blurry, Ella's look of concentration...

reminds me a lot of Luca's look of concentration. Although I think that Luca's may be a bit more intense with those lips of his ;)

Giddy Up Luca!

2011-03-30T09:10:00.000-07:00

Luca has the funniest little "hop" to his knees. He isn't crawling yet, but he has mastered the crawling mount. He literally hoists himself up both legs at a time and tucks them in to get to the crawling position. He's so strong!

ella's first slumber partyyyyyy!!!

2011-03-27T13:24:00.000-07:00

I...I mean, WE had soooo much fun! Ella's cousin Kenzie came over to stay with us for the weekend for their first slumber party, and boy did we party! This is one of the many reasons I love having a little girl. This was the first of many to come and I plan on planning out and attending every single one until she's a too school for cool teenager ;) (i know that's backwards...it's a part of a song ella loves to jam out too). I love party planning and all things GIRLY, I love crafts and junk food, and I'm pretty goofy too...not to mention, I was a pretty experienced slumber partier in my day...so slumber parties are right up my ally! It brought out my inner little girl that still lives inside of me and loves to come out and play. So anyway, this weekend was dedicated to the girls. And it was a good one :)

This slumber party was pretty classic...

lots of giggles...

and an inexperienced Daddy wasting way too much time trying to get everyone calm, quiet, and ready for bedtime! HA!

They even slept in the same bed! I took them a while the first night to quit giggling but the second night they were OUT. I loved the giggles...it reminded me of the good ole days!

Getting ready for Spring and decorating our umbrellas!

The finished product...TA DA!!!

It was a warm beautiful Spring day so we headed off to Tappys for some frozen yogurt.

It tastes as good as it looks! Yum!

I even managed to get both girls and Luca baby down for a nap at the SAME TIME on Saturday! I wasn't expecting that, but that pretty much made me feel like an rockstar mom/hostess :)

Then we went to the park and then to church. Kenzie went back and forth from playing in Ella's room to helping me with the babies in the nursery. Then we went to McDonalds to get happy with some happy meals and then we came home to settle down with our final craft!

We made picture frames and made our own pictures inside with cutouts and contact paper.

So proud!

Then we used colored contact paper to make these fun pictures for the light!

So what did Luca do this weekend? Well, he was busy cutting his FIRST tooth! After weeks of pain and agony, his first tooth FINALLY came in Saturday afternoon. No lie. I checked it Saturday morning and it was almost there. By Saturday night, we had a little tooth. :) Then he did a lot of this...

We got up this morning and went to the park. Then we came home and had a camp out in the living room and watched movies.

Well it's obvious I'm not as young and vivacious as these two little cuties. They were still going strong this Sunday morning and Auntie/Mama was dragging a little :)

Cheers to a fantabulous weekend for the girls!

turning over a new leaf

2011-03-20T10:12:00.001-07:00

At the risk of sounding like a complete whack...I am proceeding with this blog post! Blogging is an outlet for me. It is like my grown up diary. I use it to document the beautiful lives of my 2 lovelies...but this blog post is different. This one is about me and it's not as cute or glorifying :) Many people say, "I'm not sure how you do it Amber!" or "I'm so proud of you, you seem to just have it all together". Well, the truth is, I don't! For as long as I can remember, I have been an organized, particular, on top of everything, and very efficient. That's just me and that's not a bad thing! But my ways and the way I've allowed anxiety to manifest itself into full blown perfectionism, I've slowly come unraveled. Like I said, this post is not as sweet as my usual posts about my pretty little girl and my handsome tiny, but it is therapeutic for me. So read on if wanna or stop if you're bored already. So here it goes...

My name is Amber Reading and I am a compulsive list maker. I have had a running to do list in my kitchen drawer for 2 years now along with multiple mini lists in my purse, on the fridge, and in my bedside table about many other things "to do". The first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem right? Well, I have a problem...a big one. I live compulsively by lists to the point that I'm never (by my own standards) ahead enough or feel accomplished enough. Once I accomplish one list, I look even farther to the future to see what I can prepare for or do. I'm always doing...not really resting and not just sitting and resting and enjoying today, the here and now. Um, stressful and unfulfilling much! And I'm pretty sure it is unbiblical :) I struggle with anxiety. Not all the time...just certain seasons of my life. Each time it gets worse and the most recent time I finally gave it to the fact that there are things that I am doing and/or not owning up to that I can fight to make a change and give up control (control that I never really had). I am 27 years old and here is what I have finally learned about myself through a recent bought of anxiety...

-I am not perfect, but I am a perfectionist.

-I am not the one in control, but I am a control freak.

-I thrive on organization, but organization should not be a hobby!

-I am driven, but I have a lot on my plate and it's ok if I don't meet my self proclaimed timeline.

-I am a homemaker at heart, but in reality, I am a full time working mommy and it's ok if I

get behind on laundry, if I have a speck of dust on my furniture, If there is a kool-aid stain

on my kitchen counter, or if I don't cook fancy dinners at night after work because choose to spend what's left of the day with my babies.

-I thrive on structure and routine, but I have a toddler and a baby. ha!

-And as I recall, I do not recall anyone even suggesting that I try to be superhuman...

totally self-imposed...and crazy I might add.

-I have had a revelation that has rocked my world. As it turns out, I am in fact NOT super woman/mom/wife/friend/teacher/daughter/homemaker/sister in law/daughter in law/aunt/granddaughter/niece/etc...shocking, I know ;)

Some of my closest friends and family already know this about me. Mike knows more about it than anyone and has been encouraging and calling me out for quite some time now. Me, my aunt, my mom, and Mike are all survivors of the wedding planning days. I remember in high school, my mom calling me out for having "make a to-do list about school" on my to-do list. It was on my night stand. She probably doesn't even remember this, but she said, "you have a to-do list to make a to-do list?" and she just gave a little chuckle. It was the first time I kind of realized how compulsive my lists were/are. The past 7ish months, I've been humoring the thought of living more freely and throwing away every single to do list that I have and just making a huge step to live with a more healthy mindset and fight back on some of my natural urges to "do". To be honest, it is very frightening, uncomfortable, challenging, emotional, and down right uncomfortable. This is the way I've functioned for years. Today, after a panic attack ON the medicine that is supposed to help me not have those and just having a very overwhelming stressful day, I decided I have had enough and that was the last bit of courage I needed to move forward. I was ready to tell Mike. And of course, he took that as the go ahead and the "intervention" began! And I did it...I handed over every list which was almost like giving him a portion of my brain! I'll never remember all of that! But it already feels better. And please don't get me wrong, I am SO incredibly happy...and I do have fun. But I should be breathing a little more deeply when I'm having fun. And I shouldn't be crossing fun dates off my to do list...get me?

I mean really, has anyone ever had everything in their house clean, every dish washed, every piece of laundry folded, every project done, groceries completely stocked in pantry, each car cleaned, every closet organized, each child bathed, bills paid, checkbook balanced, made time for family and children, accomplished everything at work, ALL at the same time? Well, I have. It's exhausting. It's really no way to live. It's not fun or freeing at all. And although I am a perfectionist and a little compulsive about some things, it's really not about having all of these things done. If I get these things done, I'll make a list of movies that I haven't seen yet that I want to catch up on. So even the fun things become "to dos". It's about anxiety. It's about looking for a way to accomplish something to bring a sense calmness, control, and security. After living like this (in defeat I might add) I have officially given up! What does it all mean anyway? It means nothing to me. It is just a way I have been foolishly feeding my anxiety to "feel better" and get some relief...however, I am not relieved haha. I have been coping thinking I'll eventually conquer all my lists and have it all together. Now I am accepting the fact that I will NEVER have it all together and I have so much more to live for so as hard as it may be, I am choosing to be ok with that. I admire all of my friends that let silly things slip their minds and can laugh at themselves or can leave a pile of dishes in the sink after a dinner date to just sit and visit.

I'm really not making fun of myself..I'm just being honest and open because I feel like if I own this, I'll have a better chance of breaking free from this life of panic attacks, anxiety, and getting back to just being me and enjoying the good life. I really am a light hearted and carefree person...but I gotta keep myself in check. I keep thinking that once I get everything checked off my list, I can officially relax. Ok it's been about 10 years now and I've learned my lesson...very slowly :) I want to be able to "roll with the punches"...I have friends that do that and it seems to be much more fun :)

So to sum it all up...I am working on the real me, lighthearted and carefree. I am giving up control and fighting my anxiety, perfectionism, and compulsiveness head on! I'm making different choices because what I'm doing now...

is is healthy? no

is it realistic? BIG FAT NO

have I let being a working mom with 2 small children stop me from trying? no

have i been successful? no

am I in a good place? no

do i give up? YES!

So this is me :) I'm pretty much an open book. And if you think mama's a little "coo coo" after reading this, just remember I made those 2 little lovelies you read about on this blog ;) And I will always be looking for ways I can be better for them.